Once upon a time

Once upon a time I believed I had it all figured out, that I knew where my life was going to lead and that by the age of 34, I would already have had the career I always wanted, the amazing (and dashingly handsome) husband, 2 adorable children and a wonderful house overlooking the ocean. I dreamed all of these things in my head, I was (okay I still am a bit) a hopeless romantic. I believed that all people had some good in them no matter how horrid they seemed on the outside. I didn't fear life and what was ahead of me because I thought I had complete control over it. Lets be fair, I am an adult now and I do have control over some things in my life. But sadly unfortunately I still think like a hopeless romantic, and I still dream (even in the daytime) and this leads to me making quick decisions and jumping head first off the pier when sometimes I should just enjoy the view. I find that I get all excited about things and I take off, only to realize to my surprise horror that perhaps I moved to fast in the wrong direction. I guess you could relate it to adding the wrong ingredients to a recipe first and then realizing after the fact that without preparing the recipe the way instructed you ended up with a complete mess on your hands, or at least a recipe that does not taste the way you thought it would. I am not saying that sometimes my moments of making insane rash decisions had not led to some wonderful moments in my life, however most some have left me wondering why I do the things I do. I am a very independent, confident women and have gotten to a place where I am content with who I am. Sure, we all have the normal things we want to change (like the 20 pounds I want to lose), but for the most part I have found peace with the women I have grown into. I know that we will make mistakes in life and take chances that don't always work out the way you thought they would. I just hope that one day I will learn sometimes when you jump, you fall down and go boom. My journey of life has many more chapters left and I like to think those pages will be filled with glorious memories and immeasurable laughter and happy tears, however I know that there will be the chapters I would rather skip right past. I guess my point in this babbling blog is that I see now that sometimes my stubborn nature along with my fairytale thoughts can lead me to make decisions before I truly should be making them. You live and learn, over and over again! At the end of the day we can only make lemonade and continue forward.